Luis M. Alvarez / AP Photo

There were seven games on the schedule last night, but the Knicks and Magic didn’t play because Madison Square Garden is not safe. I’ll start with the one game that came down to the wire:

The Wizards beat the Sixers 116-115 in overtime. It wouldn’t have made it to overtime if not for Cartier Martin (representing the D-League) tying the game with a last-second three-pointer that could easily have been an and-one. John Wall could not have been introduced better in the Wizards’ home opener and proceeded to put up a monster line: 29 points (on 16 shots), 13 assists, a franchise record-tying 9 steals, and, gulp, 8 turnovers. Since there are always fun numbers in overtime games, check out some other stats: Lou Williams started 0-8 but finished with 30 points on 16 shots (15-17 FT!), Elton Brand had a super-efficient 21 and 9, and Jrue Holiday had 14 points and 13 assists. I wanted a second overtime, but I was happy that Wizards fans got this win and EXTREMELY happy for Mr. Martin.
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Gary Dineen/Getty Images

A quick recap this morning, due to time constraints. First, though, I should mention Saturday night. I skipped out on BfB yesterday because I didn’t want to talk about the horrible thing that happened in Portland. I feel like I should acknowledge the other stuff that took place that night, though: DeMar DeRozan kicked ass and made me happy, Jarrett Jack tied his shoe while holding onto the ball and made Bulls fans angry, Steve Nash and Vince Carter owned their respective 4th quarters to secure wins, Joe Johnson helped his Hawks win ugly, Kevin Love put in his second straight double-double in a win against the Jazz, and the Spurs are apparently not to be feared anymore. Okay, we good? Onto Sunday… Continue Reading

Evan Gole/Getty Images

In yesterday’s recap, I said I “let myself down” by falling asleep and missing 4 hours of NBA action. Well, last night I fell asleep and missed one half of basketball. Just one half. But, ugh, when I was awoken with a phone call at about 1:30 AM and the broadcast was over, I positively hated myself. I stay in to watch basketball, always loving it, always hoping to see something amazing… and last night, although I was in, I was passed the hell out on my couch when amazing happened. Continue Reading

Jesse D. Garrabrant/Getty Images

I let myself down last night, failing to keep my eyes open after the Boston/San Antonio game tipped off. Apparently you shouldn’t go for late-afternoon/early-evening drinks with co-workers when you haven’t slept properly in weeks. After waking up on my couch at 12:00 AM with freaking hockey on the TV, lesson learned. I’m not going to compound this failure with a failure to complete the third BfB, though, so bear with me as I sort through last night’s action despite missing the majority of it live. Continue Reading

Mr. Sterling, could you stop booing your own team? (Noah Graham/Getty Images)

Hello readers, I’m from the future, and I have some urgent information about how your favourite teams are going to perform this year. I know that most of you are begging to learn more about the Grizzlies, the Knicks, the Warriors, the Clippers, the Bucks, and the Grizzlies, and are genuinely concerned that they might not be able to make the playoffs. WELL, TAKE HEED FAIR IDIOTS! GAZE UPON THE STARK PROGNOSTICATIONS I HAVE PROVIDED AND DESPAIR! Your favourite teams are going to SUCK and nobody will feel pity on you. They will be smashed like a child’s macrame project at the hands of Brock Lesnar. Continue Reading