From Clutchfans.net, obviously.

Trade deadline day! So much fun, so much to talk about. So Julian and I talked, for just under 57 minutes, about all of the madness that went on in the Association. Wagman earned another DNP-CD.

Click here to listen to the podcast.

Fernando Medina/Getty Images

Tuesday night, Julian and I chatted about all things NBA. Or, more accurately, some things NBA. Like the Raptors, Nets, Hawks, Thunder, Warriors, Magic, Bulls, Bucks, and Bobcats. And Joe Johnson, Russell Westbrook, Kevin Durant, Omri Casspi, Kevin Martin, Vince Carter, Courtney Lee, and Vinny Del Negro. And, y’know, a bunch of other stuff. Totally forgot to talk about Darko’s weird, expletive-laden interview, though. Next time.

And next time, Eric Wagman will join us. We were kidding about him hurting himself.

Click here to listen to the podcast.

Christian Petersen/Getty Images

A later, but longer BfB today. It was a busy night in the NBA last night and a busy morning/afternoon for me as I watched the games I recorded. To be clear, I saw most of Raptors/Hawks, most of Thunder/Grizzlies, all of Sixers/Rockets, all of Suns/Magic, all of Lakers/Wolves, and the last quarter and a half of Blazers/Cavs. For the other five games, I’m working with box scores and recaps. You can expect similar posts every Saturday, although I’ll try to get them up earlier than this. Anyway, let’s get to it – I’ve got John Wall and Ricky Rubio games to watch before NBA games tip at 7:00 PM EST.

The All-OTN Team

Shannon Brown: 7 Pts (3-9 FG, 1-4 3PT), 2 Reb (1 Off), 0 TO, 0 PF in 17 mins.

A rough shooting night for Shannon in this 104-92 victory, but he did have this amazing play:

I appreciate Kobe’s pass just as much as Shannon’s thunderous finish. How many shooting guards in the league throw that lob with their off-hand? Hell, forget shooting guards, is there another player at any position who does that? Maybe Nash, maybe. (Sidenote: I can’t get enough of left-handed passes from right-handed players. Saw a ton of them last night, with Kobe, Nash, and Johnny Flynn in action. Makes me smile every time.)

Jared Dudley: 19 Pts (6-13 FG, 4-8 3PT, 3-4 FT), 5 Reb (3 Off), 2 Stl, 0 TO, 3 PF in 33 mins.

Heyyyy! Check that out, an undeniably impressive stat-line from an All-OTN Team guy. I’ve been waiting for this. Those 19 points matched the career-high he set near the end of his rookie season and he got them very efficiently. What’s not in the stat sheet: he played excellent defense on Vince Carter in the 2nd quarter (who, I must say, helped Jared out a bit by playing the least aggressive ball I’ve seen from him in years, before leaving the game with a sore right knee) and he was on the floor in crunch time, making plays and taking big shots in this 106-103 victory. A few more things before we move on:

“He’s just beating ‘em up right now with his effort and energy” – Jeff Van Gundy, in the 2nd quarter, after Dudley grabbed one of his three offensive boards.

JMZ Part 1:

JMZ Part 2:

Amir Johnson: 7 Pts (2-4 FG, 3-4 FT), 4 Reb (3 Off), 1 Blk, 1 Stl, 1 TO, 3 PF in 22 mins.

A blah stat-line in a blah game. As always, I enjoyed Amir’s effort, but it wasn’t nearly enough against this excellent Hawks team, as my Raptors fell 111-89. Normally, his hustle and athleticism stands out, but when up against Josh Smith, Al Horford, and Zaza Pachulia, he isn’t as noticeable.

Serge Ibaka: 0 Pts (0-0 FG, 0-0 FT), 1 Reb, 1 Blk, 1 Stl, 1 PF in 9 mins.

No points on no shots in this 102-94 victory, but there’s a lot to say here. As is always the case, because the man is just full of activity when he’s on the court. I saw him flub a couple of defensive assignments that led to Marc Gasol baskets, but I also saw him do some impressive things, like successfully getting a stop on Rudy Gay on the perimeter. With this Thunder team, he is mainly out there for defensive purposes and, on that end, he is really working. When he does mess up, it’s because he is channelling his energy in the wrong way. Sometimes he over-helps and sometimes he is too aggressive, but he’s never lazy. Once he relaxes out there, he is going to be a consistently great defender. The potential just oozes from him. Still, I’ll admit that it wasn’t his best game.

Rookie Watch

Tyler Hansbrough: 21 Pts (8-18 FG, 0-1 3PT, 5-6 FT), 7 Reb (4 Off), 1 Ast, 3 Stl, 0 TO, 3 PF in 24 mins.

I didn’t see the game, but by all accounts Psycho T (or Buckaroo Banzai) was huge. I have to wonder just how he managed to get 18 shots up in 21 minutes, but remain impressed. Methinks some of those offensive boards must have come off of his own misses. Anyway, he killed the Nets last night with his jumper and, more specifically, killed their run in the third quarter by hitting back-to-back midrange jumpers when New Jersey was trying to make a game of it. Fantastic effort and a career-high in scoring for this rookie, in a much-needed 107-91 win for the Pacers. Here are a couple of quotes from people who actually saw this:

“He was playing as well as anybody on the team. His intensity on the court was something we needed.” – Jim O’Brien

“Hansbrough held up well defensively with three steals while guarding everyone from Brook Lopez to Chris Douglas-Roberts.” – Tom Lewis of Indy Cornrows

Chase Budinger: 15 Pts (6-8 FG, 2-4 3PT, 1-1 FT), 2 Reb, 1 Ast, 1 Blk, 0 TO, 2 PF in 18 mins.

I am so very impressed with this kid. With DeMar DeRozan getting more aggressive and thus making a few more mistakes, and with Omri Casspi’s continued inexplicable free-throw woes, Chase Budinger stands alone as the rookie who plays least like a rookie. He’s got a gorgeous jump shot, good defensive instincts, fantastic passing ability for a wing, and has a knack for using screens correctly and drawing contact. He was pretty much perfect in this game and, along with Carl Landry and Kyle Lowry, was a part of the Houston bench unit that turned this game around. When he checked in with a couple of minutes left in the first quarter, his team was down 17. By the end of the quarter, the deficit was only 10. In the end, the Rockets won 96-91. He did pick up a couple of blocking fouls on quick Sixer players, but, honestly who cares? Great, great night for Chase.

Jeff Teague: 11 Pts (5-6 FG, 1-1 FT), 3 Reb, 7 Ast, 3 Stl, 1 Blk, 1 TO, 2 PF in 20 mins.

Another rookie doing damage off the bench. Serious damage, I mean – the Hawks’ main bench guys (this rook plus Mo Evans, Jamal Crawford, and Zaza Pachulia) rocked the Raptors last night, outscoring them 45-34. I was not pleased. Anyway, you can’t expect 11 points on just 6 shots from Teague every night, but you have to appreciate last night’s work if you’re a Hawks fan. That scoring, plus 7 assists in just 20 minutes of action? Brilliant, even if it came against soft Toronto defense. What might go unnoticed in all of this is that Teague is a far superior perimeter defender to Mike Bibby and Crawford. I like his offensive game, but if he sees increased minutes as the season goes on, I think it’ll be a result of his D.

Jonny Flynn: 10 Pts (3-8 FG, 0-1 3PT, 4-6 FT), 2 Reb, 4 Ast, 3 Stl, 4 TO, 1 PF in 25 mins.

I must say I was expecting much better numbers from Flynn last night. Quick point guards tend to have great nights against the Lakers. It didn’t happen this time, though – Flynn did make the Lakers look silly a few times with his ball-handling, penetration, and passing, but for the most part he deferred to his teammates rather than acting as the primary playmaker. A solid, if unspectacular game for the Syracuse product, with a couple of very frustrating turnovers unfortunately sticking out. This 104-92 loss was Jonny’s first time against the Lakers, though, and I anticipate that he’ll put up bigger numbers the next time they meet.

Fun With Stats

A lot of individual performances stand out when looking at the boxscores from last night, so let’s check ‘em out.

J.J. Barea: 12 Pts (4-8 FG, 3-5 3PT, 1-2 FT), 4 Reb (1 Off), 10 Ast, 2 Stl, 1 TO, 4 PF in 34 mins.

Wow, check out those three-pointers and those assists and that lone turnover. Phenomenal work for the lovable little guard in his second straight start, a 106-93 victory against the Heat. Let me say this: Dallas’s 2-guard rotation is ridiculous. Quinton Ross started for a while, Jason Terry is a fake bench player who gets starters’ minutes, Josh Howard is now back from injury and likely will take over that 2-spot eventually, and my favourite Maverick, Rodrigue Beaubois, is currently glued to the bench because of Barea’s strong play. It’s quite a logjam, but that’s a very good problem for coach Rick Carlisle to have.

Udonis Haslem: 22 Pts (9-10 FG, 4-6 FT), 10 Reb (1 Off), 0 TO, 3 PF in 35 mins.

Unfortunate that this came in a losing effort, but wow. Haslem made the first 8 shots he took. That’s nice, especially when you consider how much the team NEEDED him to shoot like that – Miami started this game 0 for 10 from the floor. A simply fantastic game, but his Heat stood no chance because everyone not named Udonis Haslem combined to shoot 24-72 from the floor against Dallas. Ugly.

Zach Randolph: 19 Pts (8-21 FG, 0-1 3PT, 3-5 FT), 20 Reb (11 Off), 1 Ast, 2 TO, 1 PF in 40 mins.

19 and 20? 11 offensive boards?! This doesn’t look like a real stat line, but it is. Randolph had a 12-point/13-rebound double-double in the third quarter alone, where his Grizzlies outscored the Thunder 28-10. They couldn’t sustain it in the fourth, though, and they fell 102-94.

John Salmons: 11 Pts (4-16 FG, 1-7 3PT, 2-2 FT), 7 Reb, 3 Ast, 3 Stl, 3 TO, 2 PF in 44 mins.

Salmons is continuing to rely on his jumper, even when it isn’t falling. Kevin Arnovitz said that John told him he would make more of an effort to get to the basket and draw fouls, but he only managed to do that once last night. I want Salmons to turn his season around; seeing these 1-7 shooting nights from beyond the arc is getting very, very old.

Andre Miller: 20 Pts (8-13 FG, 2-3 3PT, 2-2 FT), 6 Reb (1 Off), 3 Ast, 1 Stl, 2 TO, 3 PF in 32 mins.

Bam! Great night for Miller off the bench. I’ve been saying all along that Portland is overthinking this whole backcourt situation and they just need to put the ball in Andre’s trusty hands. Brandon Roy is dangerous as a primary ballhandler, but he’s a shooting guard and he’s also fantastic off the ball. Steve Blake is a backup who can play next to Miller when they need to spread the floor. Andre Miller can score and he can create easy baskets for his teammates like no one the Blazers have had in years. He really should be the starter, but if he’s getting 32 minutes of playing time, it doesn’t really matter. I was rooting for him more than anyone down the stretch of this one, but the Blazers eventually fell to Cleveland, 104-99.

Anderson Varejao: 22 Pts (10-17 FG, 2-3 FT), 10 Reb (4 Off), 1 Ast, 1 Blk, 2 Stl, 1 TO, 2 PF in 36 mins.

I was pretty critical of the Cavs when they gave him his big contract extension in the summer, but I’ve got my mouth shut now. I should really put him in the “impressive” section because he impressed the hell out of me last night, but let’s stick with the numbers. Those points were unexpected and they were enormous for his team in the second half of this kinda-close game. You expect the great on-ball and help defense from him, and you expect the rebounding, but if he’s converting around the basket at that rate it makes the Cavs a way more dangerous team.

Chris Duhon: 22 Pts (7-11 FG, 6-8 3PT, 2-2 FT), 2 Reb, 9 Ast, 1 Stl, 0 TO, 4 PF in 34 mins.

Ugh. Who is this guy? This isn’t the guy I dropped from my fantasy team. That guy was shooting something like 3% from the floor earlier on this year. I was shocked when I saw that efficiency, those threes, those assist. And… no turnovers?! Unbelievable. I didn’t catch any of New York’s 113-96 victory over the Hornets, but it sure looks like Duhon played a perfect game. Apparently it was 96-95 for New Orleans with under five minutes left in the game when he sank back-to-back threes and Al Harrington followed with a pair of his own. What a crazy way to end a game.

Manu Ginobili: 22 Pts (7-12 FG, 4-5 3PT, 4-4 FT), 4 Reb (1 Off), 2 Ast, 2 Stl, 1 Blk, 3 TO, 3 PF in 26 mins.

I remember these stat lines. You see 22 and 4, with some steals and blocks and think “hey, Manu had a decent game.” Then, you notice he only played 26 minutes. The Poo God came up big in this 104-85 blowout against Charlotte. I should add that this was kind of a weird game – the Spurs were up 65-43 only minutes into the 2nd half (thanks to Ginobili’s 20 first half points), but the Bobcats ended up winning the third quarter 29-13. Down by 1 entering the fourth, Charlotte would get no closer, as the Spurs turned it back on and cruised to their 10th victory in 11 tries against the ‘Cats.

Mickael Pietrus: 23 Pts (8-15 FG, 4-8 3PT, 3-3 FT), 8 Reb (2 Off), 1 Stl, 1 Blk, 2 TO, 2 PF in 32 mins.

Pietrus made up for Vince Carter’s absence in the third quarter by scoring 15 points in that period alone. Phoenix continually lost him behind the arc and he made them pay. If Orlando had ended up pulling out a victory, Suns fans would be having nightmares of this guy shooting three-pointers. This was the second game this season he’s scored more than 20 points and I hope he reaches that total many more times before the season’s end. Love those 8 rebounds, too.

Dwight Howard: 10 Pts (1-1 FG, 8-17 FT), 18 Reb (5 Off), 2 Ast, 2 Stl, 5 TO, 3 PF in 41 mins.

Can you remember the last time you saw Dwight Howard only attempt one field goal? Me neither. I’m telling you, this was a weird game. Whenever he caught the ball under the basket, Phoenix hacked him. And it worked out alright this time – Howard shot below 50% from the line for the first time since November 22 in Toronto. The rebounding is impressive, but if you’re a Magic fan you want less turnovers, more field goal attempts, and at least one block from your superstar.

Impressive

Carl Landry: 20 Pts (4-9 FG, 12-14 FT), 7 Reb (3 Off), 2 Ast, 2 Blk, 3 TO, 2 PF in 33 mins.

Is it possible to say a gritty big man “makes it look easy?” Normally, when you hear someone say that about a player, it’s about a wing guy or a point guard who has just made some beautiful spin move or gliding lay-up or something, not a tough 4-man who has scored in the post. But, seriously, Carl Landry makes it look easy. “It” being scoring inside and drawing fouls. You watch him and you wonder why every power forward can’t get those shots off and draw that contact. Well, I’ll tell you why. Landry is a natural around the basket. He has great footwork, perfect timing, and a very soft touch. He knows how to score against bigger and smaller defenders and he knows how to get to the line. When he gets to the line, he converts them, and that’s how he ends up scoring 20 points on just 9 shots. Coach Rick Adelman made a conscious effort to feed him the ball down the stretch, as nobody Philadelphia threw out there could deal with him. I’ve been pumping up this guy for a long time so it makes me happy to see him develop into Houston’s go-to-guy. He was easily the best big man on the floor in this one, and Elton Brand actually had himself a pretty damn good game.

Allen Iverson: 20 Pts (7-18 FG, 6-9 FT), 5 Reb, 3 Ast, 1 TO, 2 PF in 35 mins.

The numbers are pretty good, especially considering the whole “34-year-old who has barely played in months” thing. But what impressed me more is what doesn’t show up there. He’s doing good things, but he’s also NOT doing the things that some people were worried about. He’s not dominating the ball, he’s not taking a lot of contested shots, and he’s not embarrassing himself on D. I’ll admit it’s a bit weird that he’s not always the fastest guy on the court now (this night, it was Aaron Brooks) and he did make me scream when he fouled the fastest man on the court when he was shooting a 3-pointer, but I liked what I saw. I like it even more when I consider the fact that he should be twice as comfortable and in rhythm in just a couple more weeks.

Jamal Crawford: 15 Pts (6-12 FG, 1-3 3PT, 2-2 FT), 3 Reb (2 Off), 3 Ast, 1 Stl, 4 TO, 1 PF in 29 mins.

Obviously, I’m not impressed with the assist-to-turnover ratio here, but I am in general impressed with Crawford. He was going to get some numbers last night, as he could get his shot off and get in the key whenever he wanted against Toronto’s defense (God, I hate mentioning this), but what I like is just how well he’s fit in with that team. He’s playing 8 fewer minutes than he did last season and he seems 100% happy with it. This is the first time in his career he’s played for a good team and he has embraced his 6th-man role. There have been more than a handful of nights this season where his team has needed him to step up and pour in a ton of points, but, with all the other options available, he doesn’t need to do it all the time. So, he’s become a willing passer and has run the offense for significant stretches. For a guy who was born to score, this is something to respect.

Kevin Durant: 32 Pts (10-22 FG, 1-7 3PT, 11-12 FT), 10 Reb (3 Off), 4 Ast, 2 Blk, 2 TO, 2 PF in 41 mins

Speaking of guys who were born to score, wow. It’s hard to describe Durant here. I’ve already used the “he makes it look easy” thing, haven’t I? Bah. Last night, whenever Durant wanted to score, he did. Or he got fouled, where he converted all but one of his free throws. This team wins games because it goes the extra mile on defense, and, when it needs a basket, KD can get one. The thing with Durant, though, is that we’ve seen this scoring ability before. Hell, we saw it at Texas. But we didn’t see those 10 rebounds all that often. Or those 2 blocks, or those 4 assists. He has made a leap this year – where he was once merely one of the league’s foremost assassins, now he is an all-around player who can hurt you in many ways on both ends. His man D has improved, his help D has improved, and his passing has improved. I feel privileged just watching this happen. You should be tuning in, too.

Nick Collison: 8 Pts (4-8 FG), 7 Reb (4 Off), 1 Ast, 1 Blk, 1 Stl, 1 TO, 4 PF in 17 mins.

All heart, this guy. I should hate him for taking minutes from my man Ibaka, but I don’t. He takes charges, he contests shots, he crashes the glass, and he helps his team win. Nothing flashy here, but it works.

Steve Nash: 20 Pts (6-13 FG, 2-4 3PT, 6-7 FT), 7 Reb (1 Off), 18 Ast, 3 TO, 1 PF in 40 mins.

Am I allowed to say that he played better than this? I mean, that’s an incredible line. I’m not sure it does Nash justice, though. He had 18 assists, but that could have easily been 24 or 25 if his teammates had hit a few more open shots. He put on a clinic, as he often does, and Orlando had no answer for him. This was a hell of a victory for the Suns and there was no one more responsible than their point guard.

Amar’e Stoudemire: 28 Pts (12-21 FG, 4-7 FT), 10 Reb (1 Off), 2 Ast, 3 Stl, 3 TO, 4 PF in 41 mins.

This guy was close, though. See that one offensive rebound? It was critical. When Jared Dudley missed a three-pointer, contested by Dwight Howard, Amar’e ripped the rebound away from Orlando and slammed home a dunk with 6.9 seconds left in the game. This ended up being the winning play in this strange, strange game that featured a number of late turnovers and one of the most dumbfounding referee decisions I’ve ever seen on a jump-ball with just seconds left in the game. Anyway, yeah, terrific work from the big man with the goggles.

Kevin Love: 7 Pts (3-14 FG, 1-2 3PT,), 19 Reb (8 Off), 1 Ast, 1 Blk, 1 TO, 2 PF in 33 mins.

It’s as if he was honouring his coach, Kurt Rambis, who received his championship ring last night for his work as an assistant to Phil Jackson last year. Yes, those 8 offensive rebounds and those 11 missed field goals are related, but you still have to appreciate Kevin’s effort. I really dig it when hustle guys are also skill guys, and this is certainly the case with Kevin Love. He is not only an elite rebounder and energy guy, but he is one of the best passing big men in the league and boasts legitimate 3-point range. The Wolves might not win many games, but they’re worth watching to see him and Jefferson down low. Oh, and that Jonny Flynn guy too.

Ramon Sessions: 15 Pts (7-9 FG, 1-2 3PT), 5 Ast, 1 Stl, 4 TO, 4 PF in 22 mins.

You know the story. He should play more. He was remarkable yesterday. One of his two misses was a heave at the end of the third quarter. Yet, still, 22 minutes. Finally, Damien Wilkins was limited to just 9 minutes on the court, but Rambis handed out 22, 25, and 17 minutes to Aleksander Pavlovic, Corey Brewer, and Wayne Ellington respectively. Nothing against those guys, really, but Sessions is far superior. And yes, he can play with Flynn. Kinda. He can play better with Flynn than those guys can, and that’s the point. I’m going to keep tracking his minutes and his production in this space, with the hope that soon I’ll be talking about 20-point, 12 assist, 34 minute efforts from this talented young guard.

Kobe Bryant: 20 Pts (8-18 FG, 1-3 3PT, 3-4 FT), 5 Reb, 5 Ast, 1 Blk, 1 Stl, 4 TO, 2 PF in 24 mins.

The numbers aren’t special for Bryant, but he got them with a fractured index finger on his right hand. He hurt himself in the first quarter, played through it for a bit, got X-rayed, and returned in the second half with a splint on his finger. Since he is the most skilled player on the planet, it didn’t slow him down much. He just used his left hand, because he’s basically ambidextrous. You remember that pass to Shannon Brown? Yeah, the majority of his passes were left-handed. As were his shots around the basket. There is only one Kobe.

Pau Gasol: 17 Pts (8-14 FG, 1-1 FT), 20 Reb (8 Off), 7 Ast, 1 Blk, 1 Stl, 5 TO, 2 PF in 38 mins.

With Kobe limited (sorta), Pau dominated. 17/20/7? Those are Hakeem numbers. And you shouldn’t be surprised. He may act like a second-banana alongside Kobe, but Gasol is a truly elite big man. With him operating at full strength, the Lakers seem unstoppable. I’m really hoping that Orlando gets their D sorted out, the Celtics find a way to stay healthy, and the Spurs and Nuggets get consistent, because I fear that the Lakers will just roll through the competition all year, including the playoffs.

Quoted

“It’s not disheartening, they beat us. You’re going to get beat. Sometimes teams are better than you. They’re better than us. They smoked us once and they beat us again today.” – Chris Bosh

“Is Robin Lopez a twin brother of Brook Lopez or Anderson Varejao?” – Jeff Van Gundy, in the 2nd quarter of the Suns/Magic game.

Tweeted

@stackmack: Hawks bench is 12-for-13 from the floor.

Moments later…

@stackmack: Make that 13-for-14..

@ShamSports: Bulls and Warriors at an 87-87 tie with 31 seconds left. Warriors about 45 points below their season average. Bulls right at theirs.

@HowardBeckNYT: Knicks have won 4 straight — longest winning streak since Jan. 2006 (six straight under Larry Brown)

To Watch

Dunk of the year candidate – Corey Brewer on Derek Fisher:

To Listen

Episode 35 of The Chronicles Of Crotty

Podcast Paroxysm featuring Matt From Blog-A-Bull.

Noah Graham / Getty Images

I’m not a basketball lifer, I’m aware of this. I’m a white kid from Toronto. I didn’t see my first basketball game (in person or on TV) until 1995. I didn’t really get into basketball until I was 16. Yet here I am, confounded by the sheer idiocy that’s going on in and around the NBA. I can’t know more about basketball, interpersonal skills and basic math than people paid 6 or 7 figures to know these things right? Right? Well, can someone explain the following to me?

Memphis is paying Allen Iverson not to play. What is this, Groundhog Day? Didn’t they see what happened in Detroit? We all knew the deal, AI would not be a backup. Why were they surprised when he didn’t want to be one for the Grizz? And if AI was getting out of what he described as the worst situation in his career, where he claims he was stabbed in the back by former coach Curry, wouldn’t he have tried to get some assurances from the club that he wouldn’t be back in the same boat?

Byron Scott gets fired after a 3-6 start. He is replaced by his GM. Which would be fine, if the poor start wasn’t more related to the GM mismanaging that roster since the Hornets’ playoff run of 2 years ago than poor coaching. Or if they were replacing the coach with a better coach. Or if they weren’t hiring a lead assistant who they already have fired. Or if they tried to find a wing player who could actually play some ball. As Chris Paul read this, a single tear rolled down his cheek. He knows he doesn’t have the teammates. He knows.

The Knicks suspended Eddy Curry because he wasn’t in shape. Now he’s in shape. The problem: he may have lost 70 pounds but he’s still EDDY MOTHER FUCKING CURRY! How in gods name is he going to run with a D’Antoni system?! The dude might not be a walking balloon boy anymore, but he still won’t suddenly turn into Amar’e Staudemire or something. He isn’t a fast break type player. He’s not. Either you form a system around the players, or get players that fit the system. Eddy Curry doesn’t fit either template for the Knicks. Speaking of the Knicks’ template, the whole run and gun score a lot of points only works if you SCORE A LOT OF POINTS! Not when you give up 108 a freaking game and score about 100. Shockingly, these Knicks are actually WORSE on offense than they are on D! This is not how D’Antoni-ball is supposed to work. But it’s okay, the Knicks play at Madison Square Garden. Of course LeBron wants to play there next season. Duh.

Don Nelson still has a job? I don’t even want to talk about the Warriors. I feel sick.

The Nets are so far down right now that they LITERALLY threw away (1:50 here) their first chance to win a game this season. These people play professional basketball. Help! I don’t care that people are injured. If you can’t inbound a ball even CLOSE to a teammate, there are far bigger issues at play than injuries.

The Blazers have some of the best young offensive talent in the league. So it makes perfect sense that they’re playing at the 3rd slowest pace of any team in the NBA. Yet they’re still 19th in scoring. 28th in pace, 19th in scoring. The team has Brandon Roy and LaMarcus freaking Aldridge! DON’T BE AFRAID TO SHOOT THE FUCKING BALL! YOU HAVE ODEN UNDER THE BASKET FOR GOD’S SAKE! They have a hyper-efficient offense so why not actually use it more?! This team is the jackass who buys a Ferrari, only takes it on cruises around the neighbourhood and won’t change out of 2nd gear. I watch basketball to be entertained. I play fantasy basketball to heighten that entertainment. I love defense, rebounding, hustle, and the down and dirty guys (see my Nuggets piece where I wax poetic about the likes of Birdman and Joey Graham). But I also want to see some end to end action! I want to see the best athletes in the world making the most of their talent and abilities. Moreover, I don’t want to see one more fucking boxscore where Roy, Aldridge and Oden have to get their stats from a total of 90-something points and 40-something rebounds! Let them loose a LITTLE bit. Please! I’m begging you. Last year, they were 30th in pace and 1st in efficiency. This year, they’re 28th in pace and a bit lower in the efficiency (8th). Still good, yes, but is it really going to negatively impact the team too much to maybe bump the offense up to 20th in pace? Really? They’re getting 89.4 possessions in 48 minutes. 2 more possessions a game gets them to 19th. That’s it! Will an extra 2 possessions hurt their efficiency THAT much?! Okay, maybe I’m just angry as a fantasy owner of Roy and Aldridge. And Oden. In fact, I’m pretty sure I just sunk any trade value that Aldridge had. Let’s just move on.

Philadelphia has one really good low post player in Marreese Speights, but can’t play him big minutes because they fear the two vets ahead of him would become malcontents if moved to the bench. This team actually has a quality building block in their frontcourt, and Eddie Jordan must know that the kid is going to start eventually. The Sixers won’t be very good this year – common sense says that counting on Sam Dalembert in the first place destined this team for failure. They need to embrace the fuutre. Obviously, I am not a Dalembert fan. I am not a Brand fan, either. I do however enjoy Brand’s play if for nothing else than to laugh at James, who drafted big Elton right after I took Boozer. Sucker. (Ed.: Ugh, I want to make fun of you for not keeping Marc Gasol, but that Brand thing was too upsetting. You’re mean.)

Chicago brought in John Salmons at the deadline last year, presumably to groom a replacement since they’d already decided they weren’t keeping Gordon (I’d rather have the cap space too). The mistake: not recognizing that Salmons wasn’t a great basketball player and cashing out while he had serious value. Now they can’t do anything with him. Not that it really matters. Even if they had the pieces, they’d still find a way to fuck it up. James thinks I should give VDN credit for fixing the defense… but they replaced a defensive pylon at 2 guard with someone who plays, and Rose and Noah got a year better. VDN just happened to be along for the ride. And he’s supposed to get credit for that? Pfff. Last year, I thought Vinny Del Negro was an inexperienced moron in over his head. Now, I just think he’s dumb.

What’s my problem with Vinny? Well, he doesn’t know his personnel. He makes poor decisions. On the potential game-winning buzzer beating shot that Miller made against Denver the other day, Luol Deng actually said “I thought it was a fact you can’t shoot with 0.3. So that’s why I was kind of like, I mean, if it counted then they’ve got to change a lot of things because I thought it was 0.4.” Really. Wouldn’t you think this MIGHT come up during the timeout that preceded the play? What the hell was Vinny talking about in that timeout? It’s not like he was drawing up some top secret super-duper guaranteed-to-work play. The Outside The NBA team was watching that game from our hub of James’s basement (basking in post podcast glow), and while Julian and I disagreed with James’s assertion the basket should count (Ed.: I said it looked very close on the replay, not that it should definitely count), I think we could all agree that Denver’s curious decision to not bother to cover Brad Miller was far more of a factor in Miller getting that good a look than any genius that Del Negro came up with. Not to mention the fact that VDN STILL hasn’t figured out that for Rose to be effective he needs to be on the floor with someone who can great space for him by making shots. One person. Not 3 people standing 20 feet from the basket jacking contested shots while everyone stands still. When the fucking Toronto Raptors can shut you down in an entire half of basketball, you have problems. I don’t want to hear the “they were tired, they were on a back to back” excuse. That’s horseshit. I understand how the travel and lack of preparation can negatively impact a team, but 28 points in a half against what might be one of the worst defensive teams in NBA history? Just move the ball. Spread the floor. For god’s sake, it’s like a team of Jamario Moons over there.

My final rants and raves: Fans and GM’s. It’s between 7 and 9 games into the season. There are any number of key players on any number of teams missing for reasons varying from steroids to ‘personal reasons’. A bunch of teams are integrating new players. Everyone, myself included, needs to take a deep breath and relax a little bit. Just close your eyes and breathe deep. I’ll wait. Everyone ready? Ok, time to continue ranting with some assorted thoughts on this season thus far:

The Cellar Dwellers

Okay. The Toronto Raptors are playing without their supposed best rebounder. We don’t know if Reggie Evans will make a significant difference to the Raps’ lack of success on the offensive and defensive glass, so let’s at least wait till he gets on the floor before we start freaking out. If after a while the Raps still can’t play defense or at least grab the occasional rebound, then clearly there’s a problem.

The Bucks have lost to Philly, beat Detroit, the Bulls, the Wolves, the Knicks and the Nuggets. Not to take anything away from that Nuggets win, but Denver was on the second day of a back to back. Either way, that’s hardly a murderer’s row of teams the Bucks have beaten. Let’s wait a little longer before we start sucking Skiles off again. (Ed.: You bastard. The Bucks are awesome. If you had said something negative about Jennings here, I would have lost it.)

Sacramento is .500 for the first time in YEARS. Fact: James actually tried to convince me to trade him Casspi. Even offering players AND burgers to be named later. Alas, Sacramento can’t keep this pace up forever but at least we can all enjoy it while it lasts.

The Contenders

The Boston Celtics are off to a fantastic start. They are also the oldest team in the NBA. Thankfully, almost every stadium in North America comes equipped with a defibrillator. Let’s just say I’m glad I’m not on the hook for their insurance premium this season.

Orlando has missed one of their best players, Rashard Lewis, for the entire season thus far. And will for a few more games. Vince Carter, Mickael Pietrus, and Ryan Anderson have missed games, too. Tonight, Brandon Bass isn’t even playing. Dwight Howard has kinda learned to shoot free throws and is becoming good as passing out of double teams. I regret not picking them higher in the predictions piece. Just a scary, scary team.

Denver just got J.R “Don’t call me Earl” Smith back into the lineup. The Nuggets have beaten Utah at home and Portland on the road back-to-back. And since then, they have proceeded to beat Memphis, Indy, the Nets and the Bulls. But don’t forget that they have lost to Miami, Atlanta and Milwaukee. As much as it pains me to say: we can’t really read too much into Denver’s hot start. Should they beat the Lakers tonight though, it’s a whole new ballgame.

Phoenix has only played 2 home games so far. The first loss they had was to Orlando, when Steve Nash seemed tired on a back-to-back (the only game he had less than 8 assists). They got spanked by the Lakers, again in a game where Nash looked tired. So it seems like the Suns will go as far as Nash can take them. Here’s hoping that’s a long way, but I’m not going to get my hopes up just yet.

San Antonio just beat up Dallas while playing without Duncan and Parker. Well then. I don’t even have anything to add. That’s where amazing happens, ladies and gentlemen.

The Cavs have started to put it together, and they’ll get it eventually. Despite Mike Brown’s best efforts, the Cavs will be fine. The east is going to be interesting yet.

Summer 2010

Call it a hunch, but somehow I doubt any of the big name free agents this year will even CONSIDER where to go next year without seeing how competitive their current teams are. It’s not like the more times reporters ask said big name soon to be free agents where they are going, the more likely the players are to answer in anything more than jock-speak and cliches. All these reporters are doing is torturing dozens of already tortured fan bases. Cleveland already has the Monday Night Debacle (you’ll see on the 16th) in its future. They also got to see their 2 former best pitchers face off against each other in a World Series game. Do they really need to be subjected to this crap every game day? It’s bad enough these poor people live in Cleveland. Just leave them alone. I’m begging you. LeBron has finally asked for this.

Fantasy

James is currently beating me in the fantasy league that I blogged about. But I’m beating him in the other fantasy league we’re in. When asked for comment, James couldn’t really garble out a reply. All I could make out was that James doesn’t like the head-to-head format. I guess he believes in keeping that kind of stuff for his personal life since I’m fairly sure his voice was being muffled by Ben Gordon’s dick. (Ed.: Ben Gordon?! WTF? I don’t even have him in the pool. If you’re going to make an absolutely tasteless joke, at least use Gilbert or Dwight or something. I’m disappointed in you. This blog post is over.)

Rocky Widner / Getty Images

In our first podcast, Julian, Eric, and I discuss the Iverson/Memphis debacle, Earl Smith III, Stephen Jackson’s agent vs. Nellie, the ridiculousness of the Raptors, the success of the Suns and Nuggets, the failures of the Cavs and Hornets, and Kobe’s newfound appreciation for the post-up game. Oh, and we play a little game.

We recorded this yesterday, before watching the slew of awesome games covered here and here. So, we didn’t get to talk about Brad Miller’s near-buzzer-beater or Travis Outlaw’s vicious dunk on Rudy Gay. We’ve got you covered on Matt Bonner dunk analysis, though.

Click here to listen to the podcast.